I Don't Travel with a Laptop

I don't go to meetings with a laptop.

I don't drive with my laptop, or hike with one, or climb trees with one.

I used to drink coffee next to one, but that was before I dumped my red-eye on the keyboard.

I don't sleep with my laptop.

I don't take my laptop to bars, or meditation retreats, or bike rides (not that I try to meet women at this stage of life, which might work better if I did take a laptop).

I don't get lap dances with a laptop, or any other device, or lack of device.

I don't tie my shoes with a laptop.

But I am the only person at the meeting who doesn't have a laptop, isn't glued to the laptop, on some Google Doc that I don't even have permission to see.

Now you might do all of these things with a laptop, and you will be glad to know that I think that is great.

Just don't ask me to wear my laptop or hunker down in my grave with one.

It's just one of those things that never worked out for me, no matter how much I wanted it to.

I'll see you at the meeting.

I'll be the one, listening and ready, with notebook, planner, and pen.