Workin' the Plan

As a dreamer, I tend to be fully alive only when I am asleep, in the dark, unthreatening world of private hopes and desires. I know that's cowardly, the easy way to deal with crazy hungers. Lately though, I have been entertaining the possibility of moving those secrets into this life-world; I have been trying to actually do something, to act in concert with what I want, with taking steps toward a life that I can love and respect. It's a scary thing to do for someone who has lived fully only in the safety of imagination and sleep dreams. How to move into what has only been conjured out of the ethers of thought has become the big conundrum, the already always persistent heart's desire. I, for better or worse, am the agent of my destiny. The weight of that sits welcome as I tighten the straps and pick up my staff.