Thursday, November 21, 2013

Flushed With Possibility

Rain is coming to the desert. Rejoice. And dig in. The timing will affect all kinds of events this weekend -- the Fall Festival at Megan's school, a memorial service, and El Tour de Tucson. Wind will likely accompany the rain. Wind, rain, low temps. It will be a long hundred and ten miles. The pre-ride pucker meter is in the high end of red. Good and flushed.

I hate to say it, but I like it. This will be an "interesting" day. It certainly has people buzzing with anxiety and a sudden desire for neoprene booties.

Pull out the rug of routine and the adrenaline starts flowing. Given the uncertainty, I have to adjust expectations. If they are low, I won't be disappointed, as they say. But having a vision that holds anything as possible can't hurt.

So here is the mantra: May the rubber grip in the corners, and the wind be warm, if in my face. May the food be tasty and the road grime out of the eyes. May the glasses stay unfogged enough to see the wheels in front of me and the pot holes something other than a direct hit. May the clock be kind but honest and my heart valves stay open when necessary, closed when that helps keep things moving.

More than anything, I hope I don't disappoint my companions, that I will pull through in the clutch, be strong when the fatigue moans in cramps. May I bring it all to the table and leave nothing to take home. May I meet and sidestep my fear, looking it square in the eye. May my steed hold together under the mechanical stress and my voice call out hazards in time.

May the day fulfill the vision of limits unraveled, time shared, bonds created, and may satisfaction fill the blood that colors the cheeks. May I throw myself into the fray with all the carbs, electrolytes, and nervous energy in my body and then accept the outcomes, whatever they be. All choices have consequences, after all.

May the world glow with the effort of trying to do it right while knowing that things can go wrong.

The preparations are done, the hay in the barn, the stage set. Time to surrender and let the day live its own life, make its own mistakes, graciously accept its gifts. May I learn from the blush, embarrassed to the core by all my desire.


  1. only you can make the prospect of a cold, rainy el tour day into poetry. (-; you will rock this, dr. toso -- of this i have no doubt.

  2. Gracias Madame. You are very kind. If I can do half as well as you are doing in your life and work, I will be be complete. You go, Woman!

  3. This makes we wish all the more I was doing the ride! I know rain, and I know wind. I can handle that. Alas, next year. Have fun, don't slam the breaks, careful on the downhills ;)

    1. I wish you were able to join us Elena. We are short on domestiques and it looks like there will be some wind. Oh well, got to go with you got, I guess. The big question is: Goretext or clear wind jacket? Hmmm. Choices, choices...

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  5. May finish battered, cold, and wet, having received a fleeting taste of the brimming light within.

  6. Nicely said, Mark. I raise a cup to the taste of light shining through the shade of exhaustion. Adelante!