Thursday, November 7, 2013
On the Spot
Well, today might be the day it gets out. I am scheduled to give a presentation for which I am unprepared and unable to prepare. It's one of these lecture format things, and I am the one who is supposed to talk.
I can't get a handle on what to present, how to organize it, or where to take it. The body of information is chaotic in my head, overwhelming. I just want it to go away. But it won't. Plus my socks don't match.
I have known about this for seven months and planned to work on it over the summer. I even brought the books to New Mexico. But, of course, I did not, and left the books there.
Then I was going to work on it when I had free time this semester. You know how that goes.
I will try my best to get through, to hide it for another day.
It's a losing battle that I don't fight, but rather slide into by default. I don't know what else to do.
I will walk into the room filled with graduate students later this afternoon. They will be sitting obediently, just a bit surly at being required to attend a large group presentation. The fluorescent lights will shine just a bit too brightly.
The scene will all soon fade into a dream that I entered with eyes straight ahead wondering how it would go.