Saturday, August 27, 2016
They are invisible, but they are strong as steel cables, those threads that I have woven over the years, and that now bind me like duct tape, freezing me in a near catatonic state. The more I fight them, the tighter they become, until I must either surrender or die trying to break them. The kicker here is that they are my own creation, my way of coping before I knew better. Knowing that doesn't make them any less real, but it does point to the way out. They will only dissolve if I examine the living braid of reasons, shine light on the secrets, tease out the errors, and then re-wire and re-imagine them. I can then accept the pain of them as they burn in the crucible of transformation. There is a cost for change, paid in full when the shell cracks open and a light pours through and the old crust falls, smoking, to the waiting earth.