Wednesday, August 17, 2016

The Olympics I Would Like to See

It's too late again as I zap the TV after watching Olympic athletes do their things. I've been glued since dinner and it's now early morning on a work day. The short night will hurt when work demands focus that I don't have from lack of sleep.

Oh well. It's worth it. I love this stuff.

And it's not completely what I would like to see.

Yes, Simone Biles and her stratospheric flight in laid-out twisting double back flips is impressive beyond words. And it's not what I have to learn to do.

I would like to see an Olympics for living. You know, juggling work, home, relationships, self-care, world-awareness, finances.

Here are some possibilities:

1.) An Olympics for energy and water saving. Contestants would start with some seed money and have to build, from scratch, a water-harvesting system, solar panels, waste disposal, and efficient structure. There could be individual and team events.

2.) A diaper-changing sprint.

3.) Debt hurdles.

4.) Car maintenance heptathlon.

5.) Teaching marathon (with standardized, timed testing for thirty randomly selected students).

6.) Financial aid forms decathlon.

7.) Floor exercise of tile, grout, sealing, and molding installation.

8.) Doubles and singles parenting with degree of difficulty points for staying calm when the talk gets personal and pushes all kinds of anger/upset buttons. Contestants would be monitored for blood pressure, infanticide fantasies. Bonus points for meditation classes, communication clarity, and setting the bar high.

9.) Morning routine for both style and degree of difficulty after getting up late.

10.) Meal prep given random ingredients in varying stages of freshness. Bonus points when judges actually eat what you cook.

OK, there is more. But this life is an ordeal of sorts, and it would be helpful to see how the pros do some of the tasks. Might learn something...

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