Toggle

The brain seized up again. Morning dropped me into a big, fat blank. I did not know where I was, what I had to do, what this body was about. I had to jump start the thing, do brain CPR, rub the extremities, massage, pull, and stretch it to get some blood flow. Still it stayed there on the other side of consciousness, dreaming away about some distant, sun-drenched river. The water was warm, clear, and I was about to strip down and go upstream in my brightly colored boat, naked, to a green pool, where I might find what I have been waiting for this long life. That state of mind was not going to get me through this day, though. Today I have papers to grade, classes to teach, meetings to attend. I have to throw the switch, shock the system, and get moving. Dreams of running water and tangerine colored boats will have to wait for the end of day, the darkness that hides what my heart knows it might never attain.