Monday, January 25, 2016

To Take a Breath

More than sex, coffee, new bike parts, or a day off, I just wanted to take a breath. I just wanted one deep breath that I could relish without scissoring into a coughing fit.

In my infected state, if I drew more than even the slightest bit of air, my reflexes set into motion a honking hacking round of coughing. I had lost my voice from the involuntary whooping on the inhale. This cycle had kept me awake for the past seven nights. The usual ratio was four short breaths to a coughing spasm. I had strained muscles in my back and abdomen trying to get the fluids out of my bronchial tubes and lungs.

I was beyond broken and wept openly at the pain and helplessness and lack of rest.

Then came the antibiotics. The glorious antibiotics.

Last night, the cough reflex took a break, and I was able to breath. One breath. Another. I fell into sleep and even began to dream, a simple thing, but when one has been deprived of it for more than a few nights, more precious than anything that passes for ambition in the world of the healthy.

So, I take in breath today. I will pass for normal in the world of work and hustle. But I remember still, the desire that comes when it is not available, the desire for a simple breath of life sustaining air.


  1. Oh no! I'm so sorry you are sick, anything I can do to help?

    1. No, my dear. There is nothing to do but heal. I am doing my best.

  2. Erec, even in the throes of illness, you are poetic. Get well.

  3. Erec, even in the throes of illness, you are poetic. Get well.

  4. Our body's capacity to malfunction, and then to heal is remarkable......... as is the effect of the judicious help of our friends, the antibiotics!