Monday, January 25, 2016

To Take a Breath


More than sex, coffee, new bike parts, or a day off, I just wanted to take a breath. I just wanted one deep breath that I could relish without scissoring into a coughing fit.

In my infected state, if I drew more than even the slightest bit of air, my reflexes set into motion a honking hacking round of coughing. I had lost my voice from the involuntary whooping on the inhale. This cycle had kept me awake for the past seven nights. The usual ratio was four short breaths to a coughing spasm. I had strained muscles in my back and abdomen trying to get the fluids out of my bronchial tubes and lungs.

I was beyond broken and wept openly at the pain and helplessness and lack of rest.

Then came the antibiotics. The glorious antibiotics.

Last night, the cough reflex took a break, and I was able to breath. One breath. Another. I fell into sleep and even began to dream, a simple thing, but when one has been deprived of it for more than a few nights, more precious than anything that passes for ambition in the world of the healthy.

So, I take in breath today. I will pass for normal in the world of work and hustle. But I remember still, the desire that comes when it is not available, the desire for a simple breath of life sustaining air.

5 comments:

  1. Oh no! I'm so sorry you are sick, anything I can do to help?

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    1. No, my dear. There is nothing to do but heal. I am doing my best.

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  2. Erec, even in the throes of illness, you are poetic. Get well.

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  3. Erec, even in the throes of illness, you are poetic. Get well.

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  4. Our body's capacity to malfunction, and then to heal is remarkable......... as is the effect of the judicious help of our friends, the antibiotics!

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